What's life?
Dear friend,
Well, here we are for the third activity of Designing Your Life: the crafting of a LifeView where “the key thing is to write down whatever critical defining values and perspectives provide the basis for your understanding of life.” Thanks again for the opportunity to engage in community.
What follows is broken into two parts: a framework, then answers to a few specific questions.
The song I’m humming to myself
The question is: Can you bear it? Can you bear the highs of victory without being an asshole? And can you bear the devastation of loss without refusing to play on?
The point is to play on. To play your tune out in the world, exactly as you hear it in your head. To help others do the same. To harmonize so that those over there are called to dance. So that their tunes bend, and your tune bends, and we create something wonderful together.
When we’re singing and dancing together sustainably, that’s beauty and grace and love. It’s productive. It begets more of the same. Beauty and grace and love can be tenacious and tough. They don’t have to be soft. Femininity and masculinity have very little to do with your one authentic song. I want you to sing out your song, while I sing out mine.
If the singing of your song silences others, that’s evil. If it’s incompatible and you seek to change them to be more like us, that’s evil. If your reaction to an incompatible song is to walk away and sing somewhere else, I don’t have a problem with you.
Truth, Justice, Charity, Equality, Ambition, Integrity – I believe these ideals create a framework in which “the masses” can each go off in pursuit of their own songs. There have to be some rules on the airwaves (like traffic rules on the road) so that we all just don’t scream at each other and refuse to participate.
Feedback is the process that makes us programmable. We feel and respond. We think. Some of those feelings and thoughts are pleasant (i.e. joy, love, peace). Some of them blow chunks (i.e. struggle and strife). It’s in our nature to prefer the former. And if we want to enjoy pleasant things over the long haul, we have to plan. We may have to sacrifice and work.
We need others to inspire our own songs. We need interaction and community. We are social beings. We need audiences to sing to, and dance in front of. We need both high stakes performances and safe places to try out new techniques and sounds.
What is the meaning of purpose of life?
You decide. The core idea is to feel as good as you can while doing it, for as long as you can. Maximize the good days; minimize the bad ones. Align what you want at any time any given time with what you’re actively working towards manifesting in your life. When what you want and what you’re doing are sustainably aligned, you’ll be doing well.
The trick is the sustainable bit. If what I want is drugs, and what I do is drugs, I’ll feel great. Until I run out of money and people.
What is the relationship between the individual and others?
When I’m at my parents’ house, time seems to melt away. Anxiety melts away. I’m just being there. Then I leave and realize I spent hours in the company of people I love. Maybe I only love them because they loved me first. They provided for me and sacrificed for me. I received for most of my life. And residing in that sacrificial residue feels good. I can feel my body and mind telling me it’s time to give. From the early goings, that feels good as well.
Communities can give and receive vibes. They are vehicles that amplify both the good and the bad. For me, community is an essential component for me to sustain good vibes. Left to my own devices, I’ll peter out eventually. I want to share what’s going well and lean on others when things are tough. I want living guides and partners to accompany me on my way.
Is there a higher power, God, or something transcendent, and if so, what impact does this have on your life?
I believe that we’re programmable meat sacks riding on a rock through space. There is no divine purpose. No design. There’s no predetermined list of “good” and “bad” outcomes. When bad things happen, it’s not because they were meant to or because they were earned. It doesn’t mean a good thing is coming next.
I believe that we created a story of creation out of fear and desire for safety. I believe in the soul. I believe that evil corrupts and good will prevail. I believe in redemption and that people can change. I believe people, in general, are resilient but also lazy and weak. I believe communities can band together to solve problems sustainably, if we can agree on what problem we’re solving, for whom, and for how long.
I believe that all of the Earth’s religions are true. That, somehow, the One True God is there in all of them. Maybe it’s Communion, Peace, Joy, Relief, Awe, or Self. Maybe it’s where Us and Me meet. When that One True God is present, there isn’t a total lack of conflict. There’s a quiet confidence that we either have, or can create, the tools we need to resolve that conflict. There’s not a total lack of pain, but an acceptance that pain is price we pay to play the game. It’s the cost of doing business, of living life, so we bear it with gratitude and move along.
What is the role of joy, sorrow, justice, injustice, love, peace, and strife in life?
I believe that what we want is ultimately up to each of us. That joy, sorrow, love, peace, and strife are names applied to certain feedback sensations. They teach us what we want, if we’re paying attention and if we know how to interpret the results.
That’s what this side quest is all about. Decide what you want. If you don’t know, Designing Your Life provides some tools and techniques to figure it out. If you don’t know if the results are “good” or “bad,” welcome to the party– that’s what we’re here to find out.
Yours,
JT